Since the entire east coast is covered in a snowpocalypse, you should know how to fucking shovel! There's a right way and there's a wrong way... and the wrong way will land you in the fucking ER.
1) STAY WARM: Keep warm inside and even do some fucking yoga or stretches before you go out and shovel so your muscles are ready to go.
2) LOOK SEXY: Make sure you put on some knee-high sexy boots with TRACTION so you don't fall on your ass... and a good coat would help.
3) BE FLEXIBLE: Bend your knees when you shovel... think of it like squats at the gym. This will take strain off your back.
4) CALM DOWN: Don't plan on shoveling your whole fucking neighborhood at once. Shovel a little section, then go back inside and drink some warm baileys.
5) PAIN = NO GAIN: If your back or left arm start hurting, STOP! You could have fucked up your back or you could be in the middle of a heart attack! Get on your snowmobile and head to the ER!
Consider yourself eduKayted.
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